I Wan Be President!

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When I was praying, God told me in a vision that he had anointed me to be the next president of Nigeria. He said that I should not listen to many of the people who now claim that I had spoken to them, that he did not actually speak to them.

I was taken aback and asked how this was going to happen since I had no money and did not belong to any of the major political parties? He told me not to bother, that he is the God of impossibility and that I should not see this with the eyes of man since “my ways are not your ways”.

He led me through the various passages of the Scripture to see how he made Israel to defeat many of her strong enemies that stood on her way to the Promised Land and how He made the little Shepard boy David to defeat the almighty Goliath. He further said that he was the one who spoke through one of his servants that a certain Goliath in Nigeria will fall this year.

With that divine endorsement, I wasted no time in making open my presidential ambition. Good enough, the Independent National Electoral Commission (INEC), has registered over five dozens political parties and I will simply pitch my tent with any of these political parties and expect the miracle to happen.

In the next few weeks you are going to witness many political heavy weights leave their political parties to jump into my own political party. Many of my friends are now busy crafting my Manifesto and incorporating many things I am going to do when I become President. I am not going to stop them, but if at the end of the day I become President and fail to implement those items contained in the Manifesto, I will simply denounce them, that I did not authorize them to write what they wrote. Or better still, I will blame my inability to perform on my predecessors who had made the road so rough for me –  the sixteen years of corruption-filled PDP, and the four years of motionless APC.

Since my Presidency is divinely ordained, I will belong to everybody, but belong to nobody. But that will not prevent me from recognizing those who voted for me and reward them accordingly while those who did not vote for me will be left in the lurch since they had failed to read the handwriting on the wall.

I hate those who berate the present regime for appointing dead people in government. They have failed to realize the symbiotic relationship between the living and the dead. I believe that if we have given some of our founding fathers important positions in government Nigeria would have been working very well. Take for instance, making Nnamdi Azikiwe, Ambassador Plenipotentiary; Michael Okpara, Minister of Agriculture; Obafemi Awolowo, Minister of Economic Planning; Aminu Kano, Minister of Internal Affairs, etc. In that case, Nigeria would have been the envy of all. For me, I am going to appoint more dead people into my cabinet once I elected Presiden They are closer to God and they will plead our cause before Him.

Aso Rock, here I come.

About Dons Eze

DONS EZE, PhD, Political Philosopher and Journalist of over four decades standing, worked in several newspaper houses across the country, and rose to the positions of Editor and General Manager. A UNESCO Fellow in Journalism, Dr. Dons Eze, a prolific writer and author of many books, attended several courses on Journalism and Communication in both Nigeria and overseas, including a Postgraduate Course on Journalism at Warsaw, Poland; Strategic Communication and Practical Communication Approach at RIPA International, London, the United Kingdom, among others.

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